Prompt: Padfoot coming out to the other Marauders. I love the way this turned out, I really do. So I hope you guys like it as well :D
“Padfoot, spit it out.”
Sirius glanced up from the table he had been doodling on in the Gryffindor common room. “What am I spitting out exactly, Prongs?”
“Prongs, we all know Padfoot doesn’t spit, he swallows,” Peter snickered, earning him a whack on the head from Sirius.
“Either Padfoot finally caught that damn canary that got loose in the dorms last week or you have a secret you’re bursting to spill. So spill.” James set down his quill and arched an eyebrow at his brother, who leaned back in his chair on two legs.
“Secret? I haven’t any secrets. That area of expertise clearly belongs to Moony.” Sirius jerked his head in the direction of the young werewolf, who glanced up from his Defense Against the Dark Arts essay in mock surprise.
“Secrets? Me?” Remus scoffed. “I’m an open book, you guys. Now can anyone tell me how to identify a werewolf; I always forget the shape of the ears…”
The other Marauders snickered until James turned to stare at Sirius dead-on. “You can keep things from your parents or Regulus, mate, but you can’t hide anything from your family. We know something’s up. So just let it out.”
Sirius groaned, torn. He wasn’t exactly ready to tell Remus that he had somehow fallen madly, hopelessly in love with the werewolf. On the other hand, coming out would mean no more lying to the Marauders, no more lying to himself. He would be free to be wild Padfoot, once more, no more feigning interest in girls or moping around, unsure of who he really was. He knew now; why shouldn’t his friends know too?
“Okay.” He sat up straight, dropping his chair back so all four legs were solidly on the ground. “Let’s say there’s this…dog.”
“Is he black?”
“Look like a Grim?”
“Do his mates call him Padfoot?”
“Fuck off,” Sirius replied grouchily. “Alright, so it’s not a dog, it’s a…it’s a cat.”
“Getting the hots for McGonagall, then, eh?” James leaned in and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.
Sirius threw a crumpled-up parchment at his mate. “No, I don’t have the hots for that mad woman! Okay, so it’s not a bloody cat either. It’s a…it’s…there’s this…squid.”
“The Giant Squid?” Peter’s eyes widened. “Bloody hell, Padfoot, what’d you do to the Giant Squid?”
“NOTHING,” Sirius roared. “Let me get on with my story then!”
Bloody hell, hethought, if it was this difficult to come out, no wonder so many blokes stayed in the closet.
“Alright then. Fine. There’s this…this squid. He’s a very dashing, handsome squid, you know. All the other…squids would love to…squish him. You know, get all inky and whatnot. And for about fifteen years this handsome squid bloke thought he liked getting squishy with the other squids, until one day he saw this…ah…octopus.”
Sirius shook his head. “No, wait, maybe the squid was supposed to like all the octopuses…octopi? What exactly is the plural form of octopus? Anyway, he’s supposed to like getting squishy with all these…octopuses…bloody hell, that word…I like octopi better. Less literal. He should be shagging all these octopi, but then one day he…”
Peter looked bewildered, James concerned, and Remus appeared to be dying of a heart attack or trying to hold back his laughter. Sirius thought to himself that maybe he wasn’t going about this “coming out” thing the right way.
“Ah, fuck. Alright. So then one day, the squid realizes this…this other squid he’s best mates with. Best, best mates. Almost brothers. Inseparable. And the handsome squid realizes that maybe this…this bloody gorgeous squid he’s known forever could be…more than just…another fish in the lake. And it should be wrong, you know, because they’re both squid but…but they’ve never had the most conventional squid-squid relationship, you know, because it’s always been closer than that, and not close enough to call them brothers but…bloody good, anyway. Different. Almost better. And they know each other like no other squids know them, and that’s when this dashing squid realizes that maybe…maybe…”
Sirius took a breath, wondering how to phrase the rest of his story. “This dashing, handsome, Gryffindor squid realizes that maybe Sirius Black is gay, and that explains why he’s always dropping his mate Remus into the lake.”
Peter seemed near tears with confusion, and James just blinked. Remus, however, was completely stone-faced as he stood and walked briskly out of the common room up the stairs to the dormitory.
“What the fuck? I thought my story was good,” Sirius muttered to the other Marauders, who gave no reply but to stare at him. “Oi, Remus! REMUS!”
He bolted out of his chair and followed his friend into the dorm room. “Moony,” he breathed, watching his friend pace violently back and forth across the room, practically a blur with speed. His hands were shaking when he stopped to stare at Sirius.
“You’re gay?” he asked, his voice cracking. Sirius nodded.
“You’re gay and you didn’t think to tell me until now? Padfoot, I’ve been out this whole school year. Why didn’t you think to tell me?”
Sirius’s heart dropped into his stomach. “Shit. Bloody hell, Remus, I guess I forgot. You never seemed any different, so I just sort of…didn’t notice it.”
“Yeah, well.” Remus shrugged offhandedly. “So it’s true, then? This isn’t some prank you and Prongs set up?”
“Moony, why would I lie about something like this? You’re the secret keeper in this dorm, not me.” Sirius stared evenly into his friend’s deep amber eyes as he took a step forward. Remus mirrored his movements.
“Yeah, well,” he said once more, smiling this time. “I think this is my last secret, and then you’ll know everything about me.”
“So what is it?” Sirius grinned. “Don’t tell me that terrible story I told is about to inspire a confession from you.”
“As a matter of fact…” Remus dropped his gaze, though Sirius could see his friend’s grin. “Padfoot, I don’t know how many…squids there are around here that don’t fancy…octopuses. But if you’re ever free, you know, like this weekend in Hogsmeade, and you aren’t being bombarded by your usual horde of desperate fangirls…I mean, I’ve fancied you for a while. A really, really long time. And I wondered if maybe…you’d want to hang out sometime. You know. Alone. Like…”
“Moony, are you asking me on a date?” Sirius tried to sound repulsed, but it was hard to hide his mad grin. “You don’t think the other squid I was talking about in the story was you, do you?”
“Oh, shut up and squish me already,” Remus grumbled, tugging on Sirius’s tie and leaning in for a very sweet